How Not To Be A Supermodel

It’s the second you’ve all been ready for*: my first ever e book, How Not To Be A Supermodel, is on the market for pre-order! Here!

An precise e book that it is possible for you to to carry in your palms. Or, in the event you desire my dulcet tones, hearken to together with your ears. You’ve cherished my revealing life updates, through the years, and also you’ve diligently learn via my farcical tales of woe (bear in mind after I nearly by chance penetrated myself with a shower faucet?): now it’s time to let me take you all the best way again to 2001, after I was a mere slip of a factor, leaving my legislation diploma to turn out to be an immediately wealthy and well-known supermodel.

You can name How Not To Be A Supermodel a memoir, as a result of I wrote it about myself and my reminiscences and the experiences I had as a vogue mannequin within the noughties, however my God that makes it sound very severe. “Memoir” makes it sound as if I wrote my e book within the 1800s. Within the drawing room, while mom did her needlepoint and Eliza practised on the pianoforte.

And let me ask you this: would a memoir, to your thoughts, embrace a narrative about by chance occurring a luxurious five-day vacation with a person you didn’t know? Would a memoir usually have a chapter referred to as Physique Like a Turgid Penis? Or – maintain on a second whereas I rustle via my notes – I’m Drunk and I’m Not Carrying Knickers? No it will not.

So sure, I wrote it about me and sure, it’s set prior to now, however don’t make the error of pondering that any painful soul-searching went into this e book. Let’s not get the mistaken finish of the stick, right here. I didn’t write it while sobbing periodically right into a starched linen kerchief, dabbing my eyes when it obtained to the insufferable bits: it is a rip-roaring riot of a journey via a decade of the inconceivable eventualities and stunning occasions that life as a non-supermodel threw up, and it’s chaotic and blundering and humorous and incessantly ridiculous.

Pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel

OK, there are poignant moments. In fact there are. Actually I used to be particularly advised, after I obtained the e book deal, that I needed to embrace the bits that might create one thing of a speaking level. (As if me inadvertently changing into concerned in an impromptu intercourse present or nearly falling into shark-infested waters wasn’t sufficient of a speaking level.) And so sure, I’ve put within the tough bits in addition to the entire components that may doubtlessly have you ever spitting out your espresso and embarrassing your self on public transport.

However principally it is a snort-inducing, extremely correct** account of all of the methods wherein I did not turn out to be a supermodel. My obvious bodily shortcomings, my persona defects and my spectacular capability to draw chaos and catastrophe in nearly any scenario.

You’ll be able to pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel now – the discharge date is twenty ninth August. It has already been heralded as THE ONLY BOOK YOU NEED TO READ THIS YEAR!*** and so I feel it’s a fairly secure guess that you simply’ll find it irresistible. Pre-orders actually matter, apparently, and so in the event you solely ever click on on one hyperlink I put up then please make it this one. I’ll be endlessly in your debt.

Pre-order your copy of How Not To Be A Supermodel here

I’ll be again with extra posts in regards to the e book and in regards to the means of writing it as a result of it has truthfully been the most effective, most satisfying factor I’ve ever accomplished in my grownup life. For those who’ve adopted me for some time you then’ll know that writing was what I had began to do on the finish of my modelling profession; running a blog was a really blissful accident that took off into one thing nice and I’ve a superb and rewarding profession in social media due to it, however I’ve been hounding a e book deal for a really very long time****. It’s a correct “full circle” second for me.